Netiquette for sharing on Social Media…

So, for what seems to be the thousandth time, I have just explained again on social media how using the share button is actually different from stealing someone’s work.  I have many artist friends.  Many.  We create, we craft, we spend countless hours thinking of how a certain thing looks and how our audience might react to it.  But more importantly, we do it for ourselves.  Not to make millions of dollars, but because we feel this driving need to express ourselves.  If what we do resonates with you, then by all means share our work.  Please.

You can do that in any number of ways.  Copy the link to our site and message your friend.  Share and re-tweet us on Twitter.  Find us on Instagram and click the little heart.  Re-pin us on Pinterest.  Follow a blog.  Use the sharing tools on the blog.  Do you know why these are acceptable?  Because they link back to our original work.  But for whatever reason, when you are on Facebook, you might think downloading our work is acceptable.  Even though that awesome little share button is right there…it is made to circulate things you like.

Here is why downloading is not okay:  As stated basically by all the legal verbiage you can find on FB, When an image is published on the internet, the owner of that image immediately owns copyright.   If you doubt me, here is a reference link and you need to read Is it legal to download works from peer-to-peer networks and IF NOT what is the PENALTY for doing so?

So now you see why my friends are serious about the warnings they give.  “If you use a copyrighted work without authorization, the owner may be entitled to bring an infringement action against you.”  If you are a fan of many of the popular quote photo pages and you absolutely LOVE a particular quote, ask them if it’s on Pinterest so you can re-pin it.  If it’s not, maybe they will make it available for you.  I know I would if you said, I love this quote so much I want to marry it.  Or whatever you normally say.  I taught preschool (reminder).  I don’t adult correctly.

Moving on, but when you leave this long-winded comment on my page after I have nicely explained why the 50 photos you just downloaded into your albums are not actually yours and that’s like me taking all the photos of you, your kids and putting them in my albums and saying they are mine, and you leave me this negative comment, but you threw a Namaste after it, well then, my gosh, that’s ok.  Because you ended with “respect”.  How about respect me enough to begin with and share correctly.  That speaks volumes to me more than explaining away your actions by trying to cast blame.  And for the record, I meditate and am completing a 200-hour Vinyasa yoga teacher certification, but if I broke into your house and stole your things and you caught me, but said Namaste to you as I was leaving, I hope it would be okay with you.

Being terribly real…

On the journey to motherhood, I didn’t pause to consider what it was going to be like after I had my daughters.  I never thought for a second about play dates, getting out of the house with two babies, or how I would live in pajamas…for a long time.  The only things I thought of were the sweet baby smell, and the adorable girl clothes all ready to put on my first baby.  It was easy for a while.  I know that sounds crazy, but it was.  She was a good baby after I got over the initial “How the heck do you breast feed right?” phase.  I was constantly tired, but it was a good tired.  One I could live with.  Until the day I found out I was pregnant with baby number 2.  The first one was only 9 months old.  Wow.  Was not expecting that.  Ha.

So fast forward to having 2 baby girls.  The struggle was real as they say.  I came up with the idea of play dates to get out of the house.  With moms I had never met before in my life.  It was wonderful, and I could reflect on that bonding experience for a long time, but what I want to get across is this point.  When we finally got past the pleasantries and being “real” with each other, it was a much better experience.  If you look past the cleaning like a mad woman before anyone came over for a play date (dumb thinking).  Making sure I had the right snacks out, and everything was prepped and ready so it appeared things were effortless.  Again, how dumb was that?  Not being embarrassed when my girls wanted to just sit and eat snacks instead of playing.  Like you can control your kids.  Hahaha.  When they are toddlers (new mom thinking is warped).

So as I have gotten older, and I visit my friends with kids, guess what y’all??  We don’t clean before anyone comes over.  We don’t.  It’s liberating.  I might be in something nice-ish, or I might be in yoga pants.  We don’t pretend that our lives are perfect.  And that the snacks float out to the table magically.  Although that would be pretty cool.  Heck, we don’t even know what we’re having for dinner half the time.  Or if there really is food in the house.  Some nights, it’s every human for themselves.  But why did it take so long to learn this?

When you meet someone, I know it takes a long time to get “real”.  Unless you quickly peel back the layers and say, “Oh there you are.  I like this you.  The real you.”  So if you are hurting and in pain because you think no one understands you, I want to ask you this, have you given them a chance yet?  Are you still the clean house, perfect food, immaculate outfits, and everything is nice and shiny, because believe me sister, life isn’t always nice and shiny.  Find the friends who are going to be there with you in the trenches and scream “Go for cover!” when the next life crisis is thrown at you.  Those are the ones who matter the most.  The ones who lift you up when life gets real.

 

Motivational Monday…

Do you find yourself second guessing everything in your life?  Is it difficult to make a decision and stick to it?  Do you think everything is about you?  Well, then this post is for you…not about you.  I recently read that our minds can think up to 50,000 thoughts per day.  Half of them are things we have thought before.  I added that part, but you know it’s true.  So today, I read this post by someone who was sad about something.  And while I get the idea of being sad about something someone did…what you must remember at all times is that their actions are really about them.  This is the number one hardest thing to get through your 50,000 thoughts.

First, you start to think about yourself and what you did to the person.  Next you get mad.  You start to blame the person.  Then you ponder if you should message them.  Something like, hey girl, I saw your post.  I hope I didn’t do or say anything to upset you.  Now unless you just got off the phone with them and said something like an old fashioned “Your Momma” joke that didn’t go over how you planned, well, you know this isn’t about you.  It’s really about them.  What you have to decide, right now, at this very moment, is do you want this to be about you?  Do you feel guilty for something you did?  If the answer is you were just talking about them behind their backs to someone, well I can see how you think it’s about you.

Nine times out of ten, this is not about you.  But let’s say it is.  Who cares?  I mean really.  Make a decision to be happy…not to let it get under your skin, and move on to the next thought.  Like, what am I going to eat for dinner?  Because in the end, you can control that.  You can’t really control what this other person is doing or saying.  How they act is up to them.  How you react is up to you.

Soul searching…

Choices.  Decisions.  The things that can change your life.  If you know in your soul what you have to do, just do it.  Don’t drag it out my friends as you are setting yourself up for failure…or worse.  Stress.  Stress is the stuff that blocks your path both figuratively and literally.  It makes your head ache, your neck tense and your back hurt.  If you had to stop and give a friend advice about your situation, what would you say?  I know it doesn’t seem that easy, but it can be.  Are you over-analyzing the situation just a wee bit?  Chances are…yes.  Yes you are.  So trust your gut.  That’s right.  That little thing called intuition…well it’s there for a reason.  Now go forth and do that thing you don’t want to do.  Be weightless.

 

Hello new friends…

Hi friends, if you are new over here and want to read my story, you can use the side button to go all the way to some of my first posts.  If you want to really “hear” my story, the recording of the Talk Radio Blog show is on the post before this one.  It’s your choice.  I know it sounds long, but I talk about invisible diseases as pertain to me, so it might be interesting to you.  Lastly, I use a method of clean eating…no processed foods, no fast food, not white sugar, no flour, etc.  And supplements to stay healthy.  See the tab on the blog here called Vitalize You and it basically tells you just a few of the products I use.  I opted not to be on Lyrica or Cymbalta due to my research.

Next up, I will be extremely busy with my new yoga teacher training classes and more to come on that I’m sure.  I am using these methods instead of “traditional” and so far I have lost 18 pounds and gone down 3 sizes just from getting rid of the toxins that my body was reacting to with autoimmune.  I have gotten rid of the bloat and the IBS symptoms I used to experience from food “attacking” me.  I still have my bad days…as does everyone, but I am making progress.

Feel free to message my FB page Vitalize You with supplement/weight loss questions.

Wellness is near…

I am happy to be part of The Wellness Universe directory which is launching tomorrow at 11:11a.m.  Both my blog here and my page Vitalize You are members!  I have come a long way in a year, but I am not done yet.  Wellness is an entire process.  Spiritual, Social, Physical, Occupational, Environmental, Intellectual, and especially Emotional all fall under our wellness directory.  You might just recognize a blog writer!!  I am passionate about changing my life.  I have changed my body by finding my triggers and I am great with working with others who have autoimmune issues…the problem is, they really have to want to change as well.  Things that are worth doing are sometimes not easy…I know that.  But if you read all of my history you will realize that if I can do this as bad off as I was, you can do this too!!

Whew…get ready.  If you are bloated, in pain, have fibromyalgia, autoimmune, hashimoto’s thyroid or anything similar, consider talking to me through my Vitalize You page.  I am here to help.  I have recipes on Pinterest, and plans that can actually help you begin to make the changes on your path to wellness.  Just let me know!  Happy to be part of the launch tomorrow!!

Help yourself…

I was going to call this Motivational Monday…but I want you to know exactly what I am writing about.  I don’t want to mislead you as I might sound a bit harsh for a minute.  You need this.  I need this.  We need this.  So ahem, put on your big girl or boy pants for a minute and take a seat.

Sometimes people ask me for advice…and likewise, I ask others for advice occasionally.  The problem is, we aren’t really asking them for help.  We are merely wanting to let them know how crappy our lives are at the moment.  How horrible X, Y, and that Z is.  We let whatever their situation is get into our heads sometimes.  We should definitely NOT do that, but as good friends, maybe even best friends, we do.  It sinks into our souls like an anchor and there it lies.  It has extra weight that we carry around for who knows how long.  It might even take up space in our very valuable brain…space we scarce have left for our own issues let alone others.

So this is what I propose we all do before we ask for advice.  We think long and hard about our situation and if the situation can be improved and/or fixed by actually doing something instead of talking about it.  If the answer is yes, then write out a plan.  If you don’t think you can fix it yourself, and you really do require advice or help, then by all means, ask away.  But be prepared to actually use the advice others dispense.  Now before anyone reads into this, this is always purely written for me.  I am giving myself advice today.  Right now.

My good friend Dr. Marion gave me three questions to ponder over when I get asked for health advice from others.  The first is “What do you expect from me?”…maybe to clear up goals the other person wants for themselves.  The next is “What is your ideal lifestyle?”  She used this one on me a while back when working on my mobility at her office.  I thought about that for a while.  It sounds easy, but I really want you to think about it as it relates to your health.  Lastly was “How do you expect to get there?”  Of course I said magic wand…then I added that’s where she comes in.  She gets my humor.  But it’s hard working with her sometimes so I avoid it occasionally as that’s what we all do if we don’t like pain.  Likewise, we avoid listening to or taking the advice of others because it might cause us pain or difficulty.  We want the easy way out.  We do.

The difference is I know this and I still have a block.  I told her that today.  The hard things are just HARD to do.  I’m so damn tired of hard.  I don’t see myself as some of my friends do because I know what’s in my head.  I know how close I have come to not trying anymore.  Not giving up…just not trying.  But my friend told me I was so motivated it’s scary today.  And Marion told me to just stop “leading” and let her help me.  Because that’s what I do.  I look for answers, I don’t stop and rest too long or I’ll stay there, and I keep leading.  I will succeed in my goal of coming back into my body at full capacity.  I will not let these labels, these ridiculous, stupid labels, stop me from living.  If you are tired of living with a label and you are asking for advice, please do yourself a favor and HELP YOURSELF.  You are the lead in your life.  You are.  But when you ask for advice, if you truly need help, then take it.  And that my friends is my lesson for today.

Author’s note:  Dr. Marion gave me this listing for everyone needing to find your own AK practitioner.

Here’s to you…

Hey there friends.  I’d like your help.  We are working on a way to change ourselves.  Really and truly in the New Year.  Not resolutions that can be broken, but a plan.  A real plan.  On my Facebook page for the blog I am making a few posters about ways to help yourself, but I want you to sit quietly and think about all the ways you are blocking yourself from your greatest potential.  Whether it is weight loss, healthy eating, negative thinking, depression and/or anxiety, excuses for why you don’t leave the house, excuses for why you don’t exercise, well you name it, you and only you know how to change yourself.  The fact is, we can go to all the therapists in the world, but until we are ready to make that change, that commitment, we are simply going to continue hoping what they tell us will work one day.

Wake up and open the curtains.  Remember my last post about getting more light?  Hint, you had to watch the video I posted.  Clean your room and get rid of anything you are not using.  It makes you feel better.  I don’t know why or how, but it does.  Make ROOM in your life for things you need.  You are getting rid of things you no longer need in your life.  I guess it could be the symbolism, but it really does work.  Fluff your comforter, change your sheets.  Go to bed earlier.  I personally know how hard this one is.  I am erm a night owl.  Nevertheless, I am going to be shutting down 30 minutes earlier and working on a new routine.

Get your refrigerator ready for good food.  Throw out the Christmas fruitcake…no not your relatives, the sweets you still have.  Wash and prep veggies for the week.  Make your list of smoothie items or simply use these greens I use everyday.  I use berry but you can try orange or whatever you like.  It actually is cheaper than buying all the veggies to throw in the blender.  I also take my supplements for my pain and drink turmeric milk or tea.  I immediately change my thinking even if I am in pain to thinking that the tea or whatever I am using is helping me.  It really is helping but I try hard not to concentrate on what is wrong.  I work daily at this.  Do NOT dwell in the negatives.  Let the negative thoughts pass by, but don’t stay there.

My Facebook business page Vitalize You is working on a plan to help my customers, so if you are interested, feel free to PM the page.  I am also working on a yoga plan as well as a getting out of the house more plan.  This is very important if you have fibromyalgia and tend to sit too much.  Stop dwelling.  Just stop.  Make a plan.  If I can do it, you can too.  So let’s go.  2015.  It’s almost here.  Move more.  Eat better.  Do good things.  No resolutions you won’t keep, but goals.  Gather your supplies, your buddies, if you don’t have buddies, get out of the house and make some.  NO excuses!  Ok, pep talk over…and today wasn’t even Motivational Monday.

 

Motivational Monday…

I had a different blog post planned until I read several things on my social media page.  I am sad about most of what I see and my mom thinks I need to stay off of it…I do try, but it’s difficult when you run a few pages…so here is my post for today.

I have an amazing friend.  She is super smart, funny, talented and has a wonderful story to go along with it all.  I do so love a wonderful story, but it’s hers to tell.  She is inspiring in so many ways, mostly due to her public battle with cancer.  She is not afraid to put herself out there, and her help with homeless and recovering addicts inspires me as well.  If you have a moment to put her in your thoughts or prayers, please do so as this was part of her message today “about 10 or so my heart stopped for 11 minutes and 18 seconds”.  When I read that, I didn’t know what to say…except she was in a happy place during that time with her grandparents, and I understand that feeling of wanting to stay.  But she has work yet to do here, so God sent her back.

I want you to think about what you have left here on this earth to do.  I want you to think about all the people who inspire you and all the people you inspire without maybe even knowing it.  Seriously.  Journal about it if you would like.  Write down the qualities of these people and then turn it inward.  Are there things you can be doing to help others?  Are there ways you might like to be more like them?  Can you turn your negative thoughts into positives?  For example, I wish I had more money.  I think that in my head.  I know I do.  I am working on changing it to, I am glad I had enough money for that unexpected bill.  I will work on saving more.  Or how about this one, I need to lose weight and I don’t eat right.  Turn it into, I am losing weight by eating better.  I am doing great.  It takes time.

The thing about this friend is that if she has had a bad day or a bad experience, she always turns it into a positive one for her support team.  She knows we worry, are afraid, might be depressed, and suffer the same kind of negative thoughts as everyone else, but she self-talks us into feeling better.  And it works.  Self-talk is great.  At the end of her posts, if she has had a hard day, I still believe she is happy and knows she is loved.  That is the number one thing to turning your mood around.  Come from a place of love and seek your joy.  In all things, you can find your joy.  I love you friend if you are reading this.  I know you can do the hard things.

Cyber Motivational Monday…

I know you have 125 e-mails or more today, so why not add something to that.  I am feeling really inspired and might possibly be launching the blog as a web page in the New Year.  I am getting chapters together to help people with invisible diseases and trying to decide on an e-book or how to go about doing this thang for real.  Anyway, I added 5 new customers last month to my business and I love helping people.  I guess I was so worn out from seeing the hopelessness in the support groups that I just couldn’t stand it anymore.  But that’s not what this post is about.  Soooo, ahem, reeling it back in.  For more on what I do, check the tab here that says Vitalize You.  It’s more than what it appears.  I consult with people based on their needs and offer suggestions of my products.

Next, I made a small quote store.  As most of you know, I love quotes!  Ha, so find a few here and also show off your support of my blog by wearing a T-shirt made with my fave quote.  “Today I will take the opportunity to do unanticipated good.” ~Steve Maraboli   That is a really awesome quote.  So when you are faced with a nerve wracking situation, oh I don’t know, maybe this lady just said something nasty you, gave you the evil eyeball, and shook her head.  Then when you called her out on it to her face because she was making nasty comments under her breath, for real, you did “unanticipated good” and let it go when she said she was just joking…although clearly, she was not.  But you get my point.  Unanticipated good is actually a whole lot more than that, but you need to keep people on their toes.  Don’t sink down to whatever level they are going to.  Go the other way.  Towards the light.

And that my friends, is my 2 minutes of Cyber motivation.  Because clearly, there are people out there who need some good in their lives.  Let’s all try to be the better person this week.  Come on.  I know WE can do it.