So, after a full weekend in Yoga Teacher Training, Monday is usually “catch-up” day. I find myself spending too much time trying to reciprocate on Twitter, FB, Instagram, Pinterest or wherever I feel like I have not kept up. Then I realized that I had neglected connections on here. The actual blog. This is where my heart was/has been/is. The connection that I make to my readers is actually the thing I value the most. If you go way back to my first posts, it’s about establishing a connection to you through my life with invisible diseases.
It did morph into a holistic type of connection…mind, body, social fan page, because I felt like we needed a variety of ways to stay in touch; however, please know that if you comment here, like here, share here, this is where I feel it the most. My blog to me, is like ripping parts of my soul out and pressing it onto paper for you to read. At first, it hurt. It left me raw and exposed to the world. You know I have issues. You know I’m not perfect. You know I’m a hot mess at times. And…it’s okay. Nothing fell apart. I didn’t die from this experience. In fact, I think it made me stronger.
So my friends, my message today is simple. Don’t be afraid to make real connections. Some will not understand. And that’s okay. Everyone is brought into your life for a reason. They all have lessons to teach us, and some might sting. Some might walk away from your life because the truth is just too big for them to understand. The only way to keep on living with that truth, is to remember that being you is the real lesson. Being real. The connections you make out of that are far more substantial. I’d like to end with this piece shared by one of my readers, and hopefully you can read the whole poem. It’s still amazing after all this time. If poem, by Rudyard Kipling. Thank you for the reminder friend.
One side of my body is wearing a tightly laced corset today. During my morning yoga, a spasm went from my left shoulder to this spot in my back that is as tight as a rubber band pulled to snapping point. In my head, I tried desperately to push the thoughts of discomfort away as it was the first part of my yoga practice this morning, but little wisps of thought already went past my carefully laid defenses. I focused intently on the voice of my instructor and pushed past the spot. Listening to her speak, and breathing. Always breathing and focusing on the breath. I have become so focused on the breath that it does allow me to get through my practice even when pain sets in.
You see, I am trying to prove a ridiculous point…to myself. I am not on any of the drugs that doctors prescribe for fibromyalgia due to my underlying genetic disease hemochromatosis. One year ago in February, a rheumatologist told me he would be nervous to put me on medicine that could perhaps harm my liver. That was enough for me to decide to stay the course of all-natural supplements and work through immense pain using a series of steps I researched. You are welcome to read the tab on the top of this blog called Vitalize You. Those are some of the steps I took. I also enlisted in the help of a full functional medicine approach, and used Applied Kinesiology, which I have touched on here.
This last step is more intense yoga than I thought was possible for me. You can sit there and come up with one million and one reasons why it won’t work. But if you can only come up with one reason, and one reason only, of why it will work, then take the chance. That one reason is this…what have you got to lose? No seriously. I’ll be in pain you say. Ummm, hello. You already are. I can’t move much right now. Of course you can’t…because you don’t. It will get worse..before it will get better. Yes, but at least it will get better. And trust me on this, you have to believe it will.
So today, in the car home from yoga, I thought, well that could have gone better for my body. But so what…I went. I showed up. I was there. I almost cried in the car and then I said to my head, stop this. Think of where you were a year ago. No really. Stop and think. You moved like an old woman, you were in immense pain, and you saw no end to that pain…ever. Today, you were in pain in a few areas, true, but you were working your muscles. You were doing things and you felt good afterward…just not as good as you hoped. The knot didn’t go away like you thought, but it is loosening. Do. Not. Give. Up.
On the journey to motherhood, I didn’t pause to consider what it was going to be like after I had my daughters. I never thought for a second about play dates, getting out of the house with two babies, or how I would live in pajamas…for a long time. The only things I thought of were the sweet baby smell, and the adorable girl clothes all ready to put on my first baby. It was easy for a while. I know that sounds crazy, but it was. She was a good baby after I got over the initial “How the heck do you breast feed right?” phase. I was constantly tired, but it was a good tired. One I could live with. Until the day I found out I was pregnant with baby number 2. The first one was only 9 months old. Wow. Was not expecting that. Ha.
So fast forward to having 2 baby girls. The struggle was real as they say. I came up with the idea of play dates to get out of the house. With moms I had never met before in my life. It was wonderful, and I could reflect on that bonding experience for a long time, but what I want to get across is this point. When we finally got past the pleasantries and being “real” with each other, it was a much better experience. If you look past the cleaning like a mad woman before anyone came over for a play date (dumb thinking). Making sure I had the right snacks out, and everything was prepped and ready so it appeared things were effortless. Again, how dumb was that? Not being embarrassed when my girls wanted to just sit and eat snacks instead of playing. Like you can control your kids. Hahaha. When they are toddlers (new mom thinking is warped).
So as I have gotten older, and I visit my friends with kids, guess what y’all?? We don’t clean before anyone comes over. We don’t. It’s liberating. I might be in something nice-ish, or I might be in yoga pants. We don’t pretend that our lives are perfect. And that the snacks float out to the table magically. Although that would be pretty cool. Heck, we don’t even know what we’re having for dinner half the time. Or if there really is food in the house. Some nights, it’s every human for themselves. But why did it take so long to learn this?
When you meet someone, I know it takes a long time to get “real”. Unless you quickly peel back the layers and say, “Oh there you are. I like this you. The real you.” So if you are hurting and in pain because you think no one understands you, I want to ask you this, have you given them a chance yet? Are you still the clean house, perfect food, immaculate outfits, and everything is nice and shiny, because believe me sister, life isn’t always nice and shiny. Find the friends who are going to be there with you in the trenches and scream “Go for cover!” when the next life crisis is thrown at you. Those are the ones who matter the most. The ones who lift you up when life gets real.
Look at that. Right there, I made a choice to change the way my blog looks just by adding this quote at the top. Wouldn’t it be fabulous if all choices were that easy? When Deepak Chopra writes about Applying the Law of “Karma” or Cause and Effect, he has this to say: Whenever I make a choice, I will ask myself two questions: “What are the consequences of this choice that I’m making? and “Will this choice bring fulfillment and happiness to me and also to those who are affected by this choice?”
How often do we genuinely pause and ponder these two questions? You see the problem is, I think we don’t stop to think about it at all. If you are about to do something, but you have not given much thought as to what happens next, it is best to actually pause and consider this. The last year I was teaching, I made a plan to begin changing my career and go after what I really wanted. I wanted to write, and I found that I had a knack for social media. I knew that the consequences were going to include struggle as I continued to build up a writing portfolio.
The first time I was contacted by an editor who wanted me to submit an even longer piece for publication, I felt the excitement and happiness of my choice. The first time I got a rejection letter in the mail, smeared with some sort of greasy substance, I felt the doubt of my choice. All in all, I knew that my well-being was better off for having made the choice to take a chance. I knew that without a doubt, my life would not change working all the time and coming home too exhausted to write. I am happy with change. Hopefully, my life is about to change again as I am ready for something new.
Sometimes, you do the hard things first just to get them out-of-the-way. Other times, you do them last…putting them off until you can wait no longer. Many people have been broken by the “hard things” as they carry them around. Yesterday in my yoga teacher training, we talked about a burden I still carry. I have gone through a different sort of spiritual awakening and not everyone is going to be there when I am done. I know this. That being said, it doesn’t matter how much you know, how much you prepare yourself mentally for making the hard choices, it still hurts when people closest to you don’t understand, or worse, decide they know what’s best for you in your life and how you should handle a situation.
Because let’s say that the roles were reversed. Would you know how to handle their pain? Their righteousness? Their “programming” as it appears? Chances are, you would not. It never fails to amaze me how many ugly things I see out there on the internet or social media platforms. One in particular happened just last week. An old friend from high school posted something he found funny…in defense of being gay. You know where this is going. He is openly gay…some people from our old way of life were programmed to think differently. It ended up being rather sad…for the hater. Not my friend. He handled it well.
No matter what you think about another person’s way of life or beliefs, I want you to stop for a moment and think about what they have to carry through life. Then think about what you are carrying. Are you helping carry this person’s burden and do you genuinely care about them or are you just trying to persuade them that your beliefs are better than theirs thus adding to their burden?? Getting into an argument on social media and trying to persuade the masses about your way of thinking and how it’s been handed down from the mouth of God Himself helps absolutely no one. What it does instead is send your ego forward. You are no longer thinking with your heart…because if you were, you would understand that this person is carrying their own stuff the best they can and you pointing out their faults is clearly trying to break them down. And honestly, I don’t think God instructs this way. It’s time we stop doing that to each other my friends.
Choices. Decisions. The things that can change your life. If you know in your soul what you have to do, just do it. Don’t drag it out my friends as you are setting yourself up for failure…or worse. Stress. Stress is the stuff that blocks your path both figuratively and literally. It makes your head ache, your neck tense and your back hurt. If you had to stop and give a friend advice about your situation, what would you say? I know it doesn’t seem that easy, but it can be. Are you over-analyzing the situation just a wee bit? Chances are…yes. Yes you are. So trust your gut. That’s right. That little thing called intuition…well it’s there for a reason. Now go forth and do that thing you don’t want to do. Be weightless.
Hi friends, if you are new over here and want to read my story, you can use the side button to go all the way to some of my first posts. If you want to really “hear” my story, the recording of the Talk Radio Blog show is on the post before this one. It’s your choice. I know it sounds long, but I talk about invisible diseases as pertain to me, so it might be interesting to you. Lastly, I use a method of clean eating…no processed foods, no fast food, not white sugar, no flour, etc. And supplements to stay healthy. See the tab on the blog here called Vitalize You and it basically tells you just a few of the products I use. I opted not to be on Lyrica or Cymbalta due to my research.
Next up, I will be extremely busy with my new yoga teacher training classes and more to come on that I’m sure. I am using these methods instead of “traditional” and so far I have lost 18 pounds and gone down 3 sizes just from getting rid of the toxins that my body was reacting to with autoimmune. I have gotten rid of the bloat and the IBS symptoms I used to experience from food “attacking” me. I still have my bad days…as does everyone, but I am making progress.
Feel free to message my FB page Vitalize You with supplement/weight loss questions.