Da blues…

Coming back from a vacation is interesting.  First, you’re like I get to sleep in my own bed!  Then, you realize I get to sleep in my own bed at HOME.  Where there is laundry, chores, bills, and e-mail waiting.  Then, I open said e-mail and I am fine until I get to THE one.  The one I didn’t want to think about again.  The one that makes me sad.  About my daughter’s friend.  I go through the entire range of emotions again.  I have a rush of memories that come back as I imagine being her mom for a second.  I do this thing that I always do whenever I hear about something sad…I become that person for a moment.  It does NOT help.

So instead, I have been focusing on trying very hard, oh so very hard, to live in the now.  Thank you to my support team who helps me focus when I get lost.  I know you are all going through your own things right now, and whether or not we have ever met, or we talk everyday, I really appreciate the cyber-hugs and real hugs.  I am focusing as best I can on what I can control.

“Life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quickly you hardly catch it going.” 

~Tennessee Williams

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