How much wood can a woodchuck chuck?

An interesting thing about trying to sleep in secluded cabins is that ofttimes you don’t really get much sleep.  Oh we tried.  We really did.  We went to bed on the pull-out couch by the crackling fire.  The kids were in the other rooms snuggling and telling stories with their grandparents, so we took the couch.  I had on as many layers as was possible, ahem, which is unlike me, but it was really cold there.  I could still hear my father going on about the Wizard of Oz, which I will go into more later.  I was trying to settle in and avoid the springs in the bed which made me feel kind of like the Princess and the Pea.  No matter what direction I tossed and turned, there was a spring.  As I turned on my side once again, I heard a noise.  It was the sound of the wood on the porch shifting.  I sat straight up and yelled “Did anyone else hear that?” as loud as I could.  My mom comes flying out of her room saying she thought is was my dad, dad comes out and thought it was us.  I say, no, someone is trying to steal our wood!  For those of you who haven’t stayed in a state park type of cabin, you have to buy extra wood.  From them.

Anyway, we look out the window with a tiny flashlight and see nothing but tiny snowflakes.  Hmm. Now the kids are creeped out and so are my parents.  Well, we need sleep, so let’s try this again.  We try very hard to settle down and sleep, but now the dogs are up.  I try to put them in the bed.  Nope.  I put them back in the crate.  Whinnnnne.  Sigh.  Sleep finally comes in fits.  In the morning, my mom says to go look over the railing.  There is a piece of wood on the ground.  Odd.  None of us remember it being there before.  My dad comes up with crazy story about a raccoon trying to take it.  I look at him like he lost his mind.  We start to tell hilarious stories about wild animals needing wood, and my mom says something I don’t even think I can write…okay well, maybe I can tell you.  Something about a beaver attacking the wood.  I don’t know.  She said it with a straight face and I wasn’t sure she even realized what she said until I started laughing.  This then turned into a woodchuck, and we finally came to the conclusion that a woodchuck can only chuck one piece of wood.  So now we have the answer.  I thought you should know.

Beaver tree

Evidence of my mother’s claim…taken while hiking

“Laughter is an instant vacation.” ~Milton Berle


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