I am not his mother…

So I haven’t been able to sleep for a few nights.  Last night, at 3:30 a.m. I almost wrote a post.  I stopped myself and went back to bed.  This can wait.  Let’s not be hasty.  No, it can’t wait.  I realize that a woman named Liza Long felt compelled to write her blog post comparing all the tragedies and saying she is like their mothers, but I’d like to think that she is wrong.  I wonder if she lets her son sit in his room making pipe bombs and playing video games all day?  Hmm.  Warning signs should have gone off for the parents who were paying attention.  I wonder if her son was a bully or part of something called the “trenchcoat mafia”?  I wonder if she lets her son come out of the house looking like the Joker while purchasing a Glock 22?  Maybe she does.  I would think warning signs might go off.  I wonder if she noticed him hiding away from society and becoming an introvert?  Lastly, I wonder if her child wrote disturbing plays and submitted writings of violence to university professors?  Sure we need to have a conversation about mental health lady, but let’s get one thing straight.  The healthcare system didn’t kill those people, the boy with the gun did.

Now, I am not going to get into the Bill of Rights with you about this, but I will say if you know you have a deeply disturbed child why keep weapons within reach and possibly train said mentally ill person on how to use them?  It’s common sense people.  Common sense.  I understand that this mom was just trying to get her point across, but I guess I took it the wrong way.  I got mad.  Pissed off even.  The only way our nation can truly heal is if we get our heads out of our asses and get in our children’s business.  That’s right.  I said it.  Stop placing blame on others.  You go into your own world of computer gadgets and let them go into theirs.  What led up to this?  Hours of isolation?  First player shooter games and delusions?  I don’t know and I don’t have the answers, but I do know that once these things happen everyone says the same thing.  They were always a bit odd.  Always.  Not sometimes, not occasionally, but always.

So the problem I have is that there are parents out there who want to place blame on others and then there are those who want to get their children help.  She sounds like she has tried to get her son help, but she is only sharing a snap shot of her life.  How many years did she wait before she tried to get help?  Did she listen when the teacher said her child was different or did she postpone the inevitable by saying he would grow out of it.  It was only a phase.  Maybe she pulled him out of school to home-school or maybe she changed classes because she thought the teacher was wrong.  Perhaps years of documentation went down the drain because she refused to sign off on the diagnosis so that’s why there have been so many meetings.  I can’t say, but if she is his mom then I am his teacher and it’s time for a meaningful conversation with your child.  If you are going to start pointing fingers take a good long look at what’s going on at home.  Please.  It could save lives.

“People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.”  ~George Bernard Shaw

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